elaineo wrote:Maaaan, that's your answer for everything.
Not everything, but a lot. That being said...
elaineo wrote:"What's the best way to cook a Thanksgiving turkey?"
Deboned, and stuffed with a deboned chicken, which is itself stuffed with a deboned duck. Cajun seasoned on the skin of each bird, and slow roasted for 16 hours.
elaineo wrote:"What should I do about this mouse infestation?"
A contraption with a bucket of soapy water, a ramp, toilet paper rolls, and peanut butter. Or learn taxidermy and turn them into a chess set.
elaineo wrote:"Crap, there's a couple of Jehovah's Witnesses walking up the front steps!"
Answer the door with "Hello". When they ask if I've found God, I get a scared look on my face, turn around and yell back into the house, "God, they're here! Run!"
Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is that I make bad decisions.
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